Monday, August 29, 2011

What a beautiful concept(ion)

Let me start off by saying, this baby was, for SURE a giant surprise. Among all the jumbled mess of doctors appointments, and bad news, and confusion and genuinely trying to practice safe sex, some how this baby just decided to beat all the odds and exist despite what every one else thought was possible!
 I am so blessed that somewhere along the line, I did something good enough to deserve realizing my biggest dream. Becoming a biological mother to a baby that I get to carry and hold from the very begining.
 Now, I will admit that my timing is really not the best of the best right now. Its not like I was trying to conceive, and although Im ecstatic , I am also a little un-prepared and basically, scared shit-less. This wasent exactly how my perfect plan was supposed to go, ya know. But then again, what else in my life has gone according to any plan? Why should I expect my child to differ from what has become a crazy random routine?

The one thing that does dissapoint me though, is the lack of support I seem to be getting from those I believed were closest to me. I guess I always thought that, no matter what, a baby is the worlds biggest blessing. And just because my timing is off, there is no reason to believe I will be a bad mom. I already view myself as a mom, I love and cherish my boyfriends kids as if they are my own, and I would do anything in my power to make their life as happy and complete as I possibly can. And the very SECOND I conceived, I became a MOM. And the minute I found out I was pregnant, my whole goal in life has shifted to providing love and care for my baby, and all the children that will be a large part of my life.

 I know for a fact that this baby was sent to me for a specific reason, and that I am meant to protect and love him or her to the best of my human ability. And all the people who doubt me or have no faith in that fact, sit back and relax. I will be proving you wrong, and my children will end up as happy as possible. I guarantee it.

1 comment:

  1. I agree:) babies come when they are ment to:) I love you and that little human in your belly!